Set the Setting: February 2026
Meme drop, Sin City Classic Recap, Back on Instagram, What do you love about yourself?, Catch me IRL at Illenium/Zingara/Monolink, Photo drop
Meme drop
I don’t know how I got roped into this. Adam and I are co-hosting the OFFICIAL Taco Bell 5K Run on February 16th (Register on Partiful). I guess 2026 is going to be a year of Live Más! This 5k run/walk starts at the Taco Bell Cantina in SOMA and ends at the new Taco Bell Cantina in Fisherman’s Wharf. It started as a joke (I think?) but now it’s featured as “trending in the bay.” If this gets out of hand I will be recruiting volunteers!
Sin City Classic Recap
I had the most amazing weekend in Vegas competing in the 2026 Sin City Classic, which is a huge gay sports tournament. The competition is as fierce as the parties!
Ben and I dominated our way through the competition! We had a tough quarterfinal match that stretched to a 3rd set tie-break, but we persevered. Ultimately, we fell in the finals as the weekend of partying probably caught up to us. But honestly, I was super proud of how we played and that my body somehow handled 6 tennis matches in 3 days, along with nights at the club and all sorts of extracurricular activities 😈
Among the highlights:
Getting to recharge between matches at Caleb and Josh’s mansion. 10/10 would recommend. These boys sure know how to host. #makethefrontroomhappen
Partying with Taylor, our PAC cup captain who first paired Ben and I as doubles partners!
The surprise of the year - running into Ken - he was playing in the Sin City Basketball tournament. My heart exploded. We were shrieking and squealing because we didn’t know each other was going to be there (clearly he didn’t read my last Set the Setting!) and we kept telling people “we met on ok cupid!”
Back on Instagram
I met so many amazing guys that weekend. And each time, it was “let me add you on instagram!” Ugh, I HATE instagram. But rather than explain my position to people over thumping music, I just gave in and did the whole instagram exchange. I met so many wonderful, kind, sexy, athletic gays… that I am starting to accept that I need to be back on instagram to stay in touch; at least to stay pseudo-connected until I get to see them again.
In the subsequent 2 weeks, I got totally sucked into the algorithm, doom-scrolling about the ICE raids and shit. Ok, there was some quality cute animal content in there too (pit bulls, pigs, capybaras, etc). I deeply want to stay in touch with my new acquaintances — and hopefully find ways to develop them into friendships beyond the weekend, I just struggle with the Instagram platform. I find it so bad for my mental health that I’ve deleted the app again. I’m going to try to find a middle ground; my current attempt is to install it on my phone for 1 day a week. So, here goes, I’m “back” on Instagram (@joinmyrave).
What do you love about yourself?
Last month was full of first dates; a couple of second dates (and more than a couple of last-minute cancels…). I’m back in the dating arena. Ahh, here we are again.
On one of my first dates, we were talking about building confidence and overcoming feelings of not-enoughness, which we both agreed was an easy trap to fall into in SF. And so we took turns answering the question “what do you love about yourself?” I’m logging it as a good “first date” question. I recommend it - if there’s a good segue into the topic. First dates in particular can be stressful because you are literally being evaluated by this stranger. And it’s mutual. And it’s just… awkward. But this question allows both to reflect, earnestly, on what we like about ourselves - and give the other person a chance to chime in (and hopefully, affirm!). The actual qualities/traits they say are important; and, you can learn a lot about how someone sees themself.
Catch me IRL at Illenium (Feb 5), Zingara (Feb 20), Monolink (Feb 28)
For the record, I’m not a huge Illenium fan but Ryan’s making his first trip out to SF! I’ll be enjoying Crankdat for sure. Spotify told me I was in the top whatever percent of Zingara fans out there - I’m obsessed with her! Monolink… is a vibe. I think the Warfield will be the right venue. Come dance with me!
Photo drop
Instagram is the worst. Similarly re-added the app in Jan, after a year hiatus, and with it has come so much more noise from every direction.
Im trying out the social apps on an ipad (which I dont have with me very often), but not on the phone hack. We'll see!